In an attempt to persuade the deviled egg to choose between it’s inherent devilish nature or become a good egg we have two sides to the argument. To present both sides of the argument Conversations with a Cupcake and Kitchen Scraps have agreed to disagree on the subject of good versus evil in order to lure the Deviled egg to see their point of view. The inherently angelic Brooke from Conversations with a Cupcake will attempt to persuade the egg that it is a good egg. While the irreverently devilish Pierre from Kitchen Scraps will use every rotten-egg trick in the book to get the egg to join the dark side. In the end it will be the reader who decides wether or not the Deviled Egg is good or evil.
The Devil’s Advocate
This is not even a debate, you’re a devilled egg!
Unless you are planning on getting an egg-corcism, you are going to remain a rotten little egg until the day you get fried. So, forget about what’s fair or fowl, eggsercise your rights to be your own egg.
I imagine you’re a little scrambled at the moment, but let’s face it, you’re a bad egg so just try to egg-roll with it or you’ll end up going soft. Toughen up that shell.
You may not be an egg-head, but you’re smart enough to know you’re on an egg-celerated spiral down if you join those other whitey yolkels in their cardboard coffins. You might as well be humpty-dumpty, cause you’ll never be able to put yourself back together again…
It’s not that I’m trying to egg you on, but for the record, the chicken came first… what do you expect, you got no feet? Life can be such a cruel yolk. Speaking of bad yolks… when was the last time you even got laid? Maybe it’s time to meet some older chicks and forget about being such a good egg.
See what Brooke over at Conversations with a Cupcake has to say about being a good egg… and have your say at the reader poll over there.
_______________________________
Plus a very big special thanks from Kitchen Scraps to Conversation with a Cupcake for coming up with this great idea and initiating such a fun, cool collaboration. And now without further ado, here is the recipe courtesy of Conversations with a Cupcake….
CRIMSON SMOKED DEVILED EGGS
Inspired by kokkina avga–the ruby hued eggs exchanged during the Greek Pasha (Easter) celebration–these red-deviled eggs recieve ample amounts of color and flavor from beets, smoked paprika, and a hit of cayenne pepper. Don’t be alarmed by the untraditional mixture of ingredients. You’ll find the taste is both gloriously good and devilishly delicious.
INGREDIENTS
12 eggs
8 1/2 oz. can sliced beets, drained and pureed
1/2 t. cayenne pepper
1 t. smoked paprika
1/2 t. salt
2 T. sour cream
1 T. mayonnaise
1 t. onion powder
1/2 t. red icing paste
2 T. microplaned smoked parmesan or romano
2 T. sliced fresh chives
PROCEDURE
To boil eggs (without that devilish grey ring around the yolk): Fill a large pot with enough water to fully cover eggs. Cover with a lid. Bring to a boil and cook 10 minutes. Remove from heat and allow to sit an additional 5 minutes. Drain water from pot, then cover eggs quickly with ice. Allow to sit five minutes more. Carefully crack eggs, remove peels, cut in half and place cooked yolks in a medium bowl.
To yolks, add beets, red pepper, paprika, salt, sour cream, mayonnaise, onion powder and icing coloring. Mash with a fork until well mixed and smooth. Spoon or pipe mixture into center ofegg whites. Garnish with a sprinkling of cheese and chives.
_______________________________
Big huge thanks to Conversations with a Cupcake for coming up with the recipe and the idea to collaborate on such a fun project.
Filed under: Uncategorized
Once upon a time there lived four mole brothers named Marcello, Malcolm, Malvolio and Maury. On the first morning of Spring they were all suddenly awoken by a magnificent medley of Springtime smells wafting down to their mole hole. They all dashed to the front hole to see if they could identify the smell, but when they got to the door three of the brothers all got jammed in the entrance with their noses sticking out and the last brother was stuck behind them with no chance of getting through.
Although they were stuck, the three brothers swooned over the amazing Spring smells wafting through their sleepy winter noses.
Marcello sighed at the nectarous bouquet of flowers, Malcolm trilled at the sweet perfume of honey and Malvolio was ecstatic over the syrupy scent of fresh pancakes!
But Maury, who was stuck behind all of them, grumbled that all he could smell was mole-asses.
Here is a recipe for all of you who are patiently waiting just a little longer for Spring to arrive.
INGREDIENTS
Batter
½ cup flour + 1 Tbsp
½ cup milk
1 egg
pinch of salt
Molasses Apples
3 Tbsp unsalted butter
1 apple, peeled, cored and diced
2 Tbsp molasses
garnish
powdered sugar
PROCEDURE
This is one of those recipes that you’ll need to follow the rules carefully.
Get all your batter ingredients into a bowl and mix with a whisk to incorporate for 2 minutes. You should end up with plenty of tiny lumps in the batter. Lumpy batter works best, don’t strain out the lumps. Let the batter rest for 30-60 minutes at room temperature. Resting is important!
Set up a rack in the middle of your oven then preheat the oven to 450˚ F. Use a 9” inch all-metal pan (frying pan or pie plates work great). When the oven is up to 450˚ F blap the pan in the oven to preheat for at least 15 minutes. Meanwhile mix the diced apple with the molasses, then just plop the cold butter on top in the bowl.
Remove the hot pan and quickly toss in the apples, butter and molasses. Shake the pan to evenly distribute and blap the whole thing back in the oven for exactly 4 minutes.
After 4 minutes remove the pan and pour in the batter in a circular pattern starting around the edges and working into the middle. Quickly toss it back in the oven. Close the oven door and keep it closed for 16-18 minutes. If you open the door the pancake will deflate. It will start to rise around the 10 minute mark, but don’t open the door to check it. Turn the oven light on and look through the glass to watch it rise.
Check the pancake after 16 minutes. The edges will be puffed up and it may appear to be burnt, but that is just the dark molasses.
Remove the pan and serve it immediately with powdered sugar or ice cream on top.
Serves two. To serve more make it again, don’t double the recipe.
Filed under: Uncategorized
In 16th Century France it was en vogue to abuse your royal powers by living overly-luxurious lifestyles or fighting religious wars at the expense of the over-taxed and underfed peasants.
So when King Henri IV came into power in 1589, it was refreshing to have a forward-thinking King with religious tolerance and respect for the well-being of his subjects. Perhaps it was a romantic notion for the times, but amongst his many revolutionary policies he deemed it imperative that every working person should have a chicken in their pot on Sunday. His preferred method of preparing a chicken in a pot was the very literal Poule au Pot (chicken in a pot).
This simple, wholesome and frugal dish holds up to the current economic state and will help us all cope with the transition of power until the new guy in charge can bring about a refreshing change.
This classic dish is the original one pot wonder. Don’t be fooled by the simplicity, the result is an amazingly juicy poached chicken with wholesome vegetables and the option to customize your own garnishes.
Vive la recession!
INGREDIENTS
1 whole chicken
2 russet potatoes, peeled and cut into eight
2 large carrots, peeled and cut into 3’ lengths
2 ribs of celery, cut into 3’ lengths
1/2 onion, peeled
1 Litre chicken stock
water as needed
AROMATICS
1 bay leaf
2 cloves of garlic
10 peppercorns
1 clove
GARNISH
dijon mustard
pickled onions
gherkin pickles
seasalt (or Maldon salt)
HANDY TOOLS
a meat thermometer
cheese cloth
string
PROCEDURE
Place all ingredients in a large pot. Tie the aromatics up in a piece of cheese cloth to make a bouquet garni. Add water to submerge the chicken by 2 inches.
Place the pot over medium heat, it will take a while to heat up, but once the water begins to swirl. Use your thermometer to monitor and maintain a temperature of approximately 180˚F. Never let it get hot enough to simmer or the chicken will get tough. As soon as the water is up to temperature, it should take the chicken 35-40 minutes to cook through and reach an internal temperature of 145˚F. Test it by inserting the same thermometer in the thigh joint or poke it and if the juices run clear without pink it should be done.
Remove the chicken and allow it to rest out of the water for 5 minutes while you pluck out the potatoes, carrots and celery. Discard the onion and aromatic bouquet. Adjust the seasoning of the broth with salt. Remove the skin and divide the chicken as you desire. Present each person with a large shallow bowl containing two pieces of each veg, a nice chunk of chicken and a splash of the seasoned broth. Let each person add their own garnish. Set the table with four spoons, forks, knives and napkins.
After dinner, dice all the leftover tasty tidbits and toss them back into the broth for a delicious chicken soup.
Filed under: Uncategorized
Cupid is far from the adorable little curly-topped chubby love-bug we know from Valentine cards. He is the love child of Venus, the goddess of love and Mars, the god of war. His singular reason for being is to fight the never-ending war on love. He knows all too well that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, so he is armed to the teeth with a bow and quiver of love inducing arrows to help the opposites attract. But even a natural born thriller like Cupid has his back to the wall around Valentine’s day, so arm yourself with these love inducing flaming skewered hearts with sweet and hot honey mustard glaze.
All’s fair in love and war, so skip the predictable rose and bring home a dozen chicken hearts from Sunworks at Currie Barracks for Valentine’s day. Sweeten the deal with some Mead, the drink of the gods, which does double duty as a drink and is part of the glaze.
Share your heart with someone this Valentines.
INGREDIENTS
12 chicken hearts*
HONEY MUSTARD GLAZE
1/2 cup grainy mustard
¼ cup honey
¼ cup Mead**, or beer
6 small red potatoes
handful of green beans
3 Tbsp butter
salt and pepper
PROCEDURE
Fire up the barbecue to get it nice and hot.
Get the potatoes in a pot of cold water over high heat on the stove.
Whisk the mustard and honey in a medium bowl. Whisk in the mead to thin out the glaze. The rest of the mead is for drinking.
Set aside the glaze while you skewer the hearts. Metal skewers are ideal, but wooden skewers are fine and always benefit from a 20 minute soak.
Line up three chicken hearts on the end of each skewer with a centimeter between each heart to allow proper heat circulation.
Place them on a plate and season with salt and pepper. Grab your honey mustard glaze, a basting brush, your hearts and do a sexy sashay over to the barbecue.
Quickly give the hearts a little brush of the honey mustard glaze just before you toss them on the grill. Place the hearts on the grill with the handles sticking off the side, so they stay out of the line of fire to make flipping easy. Flip them every 3-4 minutes and apply a good slathering of glaze before each flip. Total cooking time might take up to 20-25 minutes. Pinch them for doneness, they should be firm, but not hard. No one wants a heart of stone. It’s okay if the outside gets charred, it adds a great flavour.
When the potatoes are tender (poke them with a skewer and if there is no resistance in the middle, they are done) toss in the green beans for one minute and drain the whole mess into a colander.
Serve two heart skewers with boiled potatoes and sautéed green beans with butter and loads of salt and pepper. Don’t forget to pour two brimming mugs of mead.
It’s a hearty dinner for two.
* Get a bag of about a dozen organic chicken hearts from Sunworks Farms in the Calgary Farmer’s market at Currie Barracks. www.sunworksfarm.com
** Mead is any alcohol made from fermented honey and can vary tremendously. I used Maxwell Mead, a sweet carbonated mead with 12.5% alc/vol. from these two Calgary CO-OP Liquor Stores: Midtown Market 1110, 11th Ave S.W. or South Trail at #50- 4307 130th Ave, S.E.. A Big Rock Honey Brown is an appropriate substitution.
As we plough horns-first into the year of the ox, be warned it’s going to be a slow ride.
The ox is outstanding in its field, ranking second in the chinese zodiac cycle. Dedication and head-down hard work are necessary to maintain the stability the ox requires to be productive and successful.
Your patience with this slow braised oxtail recipe will reward you with fall-off-the-bone meat, a gorgeous rich sauce and a meal that will inspire others to work as hard as you to achieve the same success.
Don’t bother with get rich quick scams like microwave dinners, think inside the ox with this slow cooked dish.
INGREDIENTS
4 rounds of oxtail ( approx 2 lbs)
¼ cup flour
2 Tbsp vegetable oil
1 orange, zested and juiced
10 whole cloves of garlic, peeled
20 shitake mushrooms
1 Tbsp tomato paste
2 cups of water
½ soy sauce
½ cup rice wine vinegar
2 Tbsp sugar
1 large nob of ginger, cut into 1 cm slices
Serve with cooked short grain white rice, sliced green onions and sautéed snow peas
PROCEDURE
Preheat oven to 300˚F.
First, prepare the orange by using your vegetable peeler to pull off three or four long strips of the orange peel (aka: zest). Cut the orange in half and squeeze the juice into a bowl and set aside.
Get a large ovenproof pan (no plastic handle) on the stove over medium heat. Don’t set the heat any higher than medium for the whole cooking process. While the pan heats up sprinkle the flour all over the oxtail. When the pan is hot, add the oil and wait until it gets hot (it’ll ripple when you tilt the pan). Knock off the excess flour and carefully place each oxtail on a flat side and just leave it to get brown.
When you’ve browned each side remove the oxtails and set aside.
In the same pan sautee the garlic and mushrooms for 2 minutes. Stir in the tomato paste and orange juice, stirring until the tomato paste blends in.
Tip in hot water, soy sauce, rice wine vinegar, sugar, ginger and orange zest. Give it a stir to incorporate.
Gently place the oxtail into the liquid. The oxtail should be half submerged, add more hot water if necessary.
Bring the liquid to a simmer, cover tightly with tinfoil and blap the whole thing into the oven.
Braise for 3 hours.
Meanwhile, slice the green onions and whip up a batch of short grain white rice in the rice cooker.
Take the pan out of the oven and remove the oxtail to set aside.
Pick out the orange zest and the big slices of ginger and discard. On medium low heat simmer the sauce and mushrooms until the sauce is thick and sticky. There is a lot of sugar in the sauce, so be careful not to burn it.
Serve a scoop of rice, an oxtail and a scoop of saucy garlic mushrooms in a bowl. Top with green onions. Heat up a tablespoon of oil in a pan and quickly sautee some snowpeas right before serving.
Serves 2 hardworking people.
Filed under: Uncategorized
In Ancient Greece, December 25th (or more accurately the 25th of Skirophorion) was much like any other day. Jesus wasn’t even a twinkle in Anyone’s eye and Santa’s ancestors weren’t even Vikings yet.
So how did the ancient Greeks celebrate Christmas? Well, they didn’t obviously. But thanks to their multi-god belief system, they had plenty of things to celebrate on the 25th of Skirophorion. If the celebration of Athena wasn’t enough, you could easily break open a cask and drink to Dionysus, the god of wine and celebration.
This Christmas, add another tradition to your holiday gathering with the Merry Dionysmas Mulled Wine. Keep a pot of red wine warm on the stove with a merry assortment of Christmas spices to keep the embers glowing in your holiday heart.
INGREDIENTS:
1 magnum (1.5L) of red wine
6 oz of brandy
½ cup of runny honey
1 Tbsp coriander
5 cloves
2 sticks of cinnamon
1 orange, peeled
PROCEDURE:
Pour the honey, brandy and wine into a large pot and place over medium low heat. Put a lid on it, so it heats up faster. Don’t boil it on high or all the booze will evaporate. You can leave it on the stove once it is warm for a couple hours on low heat, which makes it ideal for open house parties.
Combine all the spices in a disposable loose-leaf tea-bag, like a Bouquet Garni. Place the bouquet into the wine and allow it to steep for at least 10 minutes, but don’t leave it in there longer than 1 hour. If you are still drinking it after an hour, just remove the flavour pouch and carry on drinking.
Serve mulled wine directly from the pot into mugs or goblets as desired.
It’s time to get fat.
Winter is coming and if you keep eating like a bird, you’ll have to head south. But if you are planning to stay in the chilly North it’s time to start eating like a Grizzly bear.
Getting fat for winter is not something you should approach lightly and there are a few things to consider before you start plumping up your big bear butt. Eating like a Grizzly bear requires time, resources and dedication.
During the fattening process bears need to consume vast amounts of food that we humans consider to be low calorie. It is easy getting fat while you’re eating pancakes, but try packing on the pounds with berries and salmon. During their eating peak, Grizzlies will consume 5-10% of their weight in food per day. That requires substantial dedication to eating and foraging.
It’s not as easy as a single visit to the nearest fast food joint for your daily fat intact, they have to forage through forest and mountains and rivers to find the food they need to pack it on. Foraging means burning major calories and that means more food to make fat.
Two months before hybernation bears effectively turn into omnivorous zombies. Something switches in their brain that allows the to eat for 20 hours a day. The technical term is hyperphasia, but feeding frenzy sums it up nicely.
During hyperphasia they give the illusion of being more docile, but if you were to approach a bear while in this trans-like state it would become startled and would result in a dangerously defensive bear.
When calories are scarce bears can be especially grumpy, but during salmon spawning bears will gladly rub shoulders while they plump up on the plentiful fatty fish. However in the great stretches of barren land a bear will fiercely defend his plot.
A bear’s diet depends their geography. In Banff the most plentiful calories come from soap berries (an aquired taste by human standards). Tthey fill out their diet with a limited selection of tubers, nuts, shoots and whatever else they are lucky enough to find. As a result of a fairly limited source of protein, the mountain bears are half the size of their west coast counterparts. The Coastal bears have plentiful salmon for protein and juicy berries for sugary carbs. They enjoy better variety with the additionf of wild carrots, rutabagas and sometimes shellfish and seaweed.
While Grizzlies are not true scavengers, they are definitely opportunists, seizing anything that is slow enough to be in the wrong place at the right time.
The pros and cons of honey are always a balance between sweet pleasure and stinging pain, but clever bears will wear a mud mask to protect their eyes and nose from prickly bees. High up in the seemingly barren mountain tops certain bears have discovered that moth larvae have more calories by weight than any other bear food and are worth the effort of flipping over rocks to get them.
If you are hungry in the bush, you can eat what the bears eat, but a steady diet of larvae and parsnip shoots would not be very appetising. You increase your chances of survival by eating what bears eat, but decrease your chances when you start tailing a hungry bear.
Common-sense would tell most of us to avoid bears for our own personal safety, have you considered how dangerous you are to a bear’s well-being?
For grizzlies, much depends on dinner. If you stop your car to watch a bear feeding along the side of the road, it can have a devastating effect on the bear’s ability to reproduce. A frightened bear gets stressed, being stressed takes more calories to make fat, the amount of fat on a female will directly effect the number of cubs she is able to have.
Delayed fertilisation starts in the spring when bears mate. Instead of becoming pregnant right away the female carries the male’s seed in her body until such time that she is fat enough to have a cub. If she gets enough calories during the fall, her body will naturally fertilise the egg, if she does not get enough calories the result is no cubs.
Many scientists wondered how a bear can hibernate without having muscular atrophy. But recent research shows that bears will actually sleep walk and stretch to keep their muscles from atrophying.
If anyone says they haven’t been to the bathroom for 4 months, you could say they were full of crap. Except for bears who hold it in for the duration of hybernation and have interesting digestive adaptations that help circulate fluids to maintain body functions.
How do they hold it all in? Prior to hybernation the bears munch a bunch of bark that acts as a fecal plug to keep it all in.
And to leave you with a classic bear joke…
So there is a bear answering the call of nature, he turns to a nearby rabbit and asks if the rabbit has any trouble with scat sticking to his fur. The rabbit says no, so the bear reaches over and picks up the rabbit…
FALL FATTENING MENU
This menu has two cheats to make it more palatable for humans: salt and butter. If you want to get technical, cooking the food is also a cheat since bears rarely cook anything other than oatmeal.
CEDAR SALMON W/ DRIED BLUEBERRY PESTO + RUTABAGA MASH + WILD CARROTS
600g salmon filet (cut into 150g portions)
1/2 cup dried blueberries
1/2 cup toasted pinenuts
1 rutabaga
1 bunch small carrots, with green tops
salt and pepper
Preheat your oven to 400˚F.
Peel and dice the rutabaga. Get it into a pot of salty water and fire it up on high heat. Cook the rutabaga until they are very tender and starting to fall apart. It is almost impossible to overcook a rutabaga, but it is easy to undercook one, so just let it cook for a long time. The longer you cook them the more natural sweetness will be enhanced. When they are done cooking, drain and mash with butter and salt.
Meanwhile, in a mortar and pestle or a food processor combine dried blueberries, toasted pinenuts and a pinch of salt. Blend on low and use a little bit of warm water to get the desired thick pesto consistency. When it is a smooth paste, set it aside at room temperature for later.
Cut your salmon into 150 g portions, season with salt and pepper. Wrap them in a piece of cedar paper and line them up on a baking sheet with the seam of the cedar paper on the bottom. It will look like a row of wooden canneloni.
Place the washed peel carrots (keep greens attached) into the pot of salty boiling water with the green sprigs hanging out of the water, careful not to let them touch the heat source. Boil the carrots until they are tender. Then for 1 minute, submerge the greens in the boiling water to quickly cook them. Drain and serve hot.
Serve the salmon in the opened cedar plank on a plate with a scoop of rutabaga, two or three carrots and a generous spoonful of blueberry pesto.
Serves 4 hungry bears.
Sourcing
Get some cedar sheets at the Cookbook Co. in Calgary or Gourmet Warehouse in Vancouver. They are thin and pliable and more delicate than your average cedar plank. While you’re there, grab some dried blueberries.
MUDDLE BLACKBERRIES W/ HONEY + HAZELNUTS
2 pints blackberries, raspeberries
2 ounces gin
2 juniper berries, crushed
drizzle honey
1/2 cup toasted hazelnuts, crunched
Place the gin, crushed juniper berries and blackberries in a small pot over medium low heat. Cook for 15-20 minutes until the berries are very soft and the liquid gets a little syrupy.
Portion out the berries into bowls and drizzle on some lovely runny honey. Top with toasted crushed hazelnuts.
Grouse Mountain Bear Sanctuary,
Grouse Mountain, Vancouver, BC.
www.grousemountain.com
Feeding time is 10 am and the bears are hungry
Banff Information Center
224 Banff Avenue, Banff, AB
403-762-1550
Call ahead for showtimes.
